Self image, self love, self care – the three most important self prefixed words according to me.
You may have seen quotes like
If you want it, go out and make it happen
The only thing between you and your dreams is yourself
And so on and so forth and what have you.
I have been guilty of sharing quotes like this as well. At the moment although they do pump me up and motivate me, their impact is short-term.
All these quotes and messages are missing a huge piece, a huge chunk of information, that people are not talking about as much as they should.
It’s like the elephant in the room that no one is willing to talk about.
Let’s take an example to understand what I am talking about:
So imagine someone asks you,
“What do you want in life? What is your dream?”
And you say, ”I wants to lose weight.”
Or if someone asks you the same question and you say,
“I want to be successful.”
Do you see a pattern in these two answers?
Number 1: They are super vague.
Number 2: It’s more like an external illusion that you are trying to achieve.
The real key to having a positive and good self image is to dig deep and find the root of where these vague dreams come from.
There is a deep connection between life, your mindset, and your body.
When you accept that is when your self image will change.
What is Self Image?
It’s not what you say out of your mouth that determines your life, it’s what you whisper to yourself that has the most power! – Robert Kiyosaki
Self-image is the internalized image that you have of yourself, your personality, and your physical features combined.
Contrary to popular belief it is not just what you feel when you think about yourself right now at this moment. It’s actually a bunch of little simple things that happen right under your nose that you dont pay attention to, that makes up your self image.
What is your Self Image made up of
Think back to when you were a child, or a few years back or just even yesterday when someone said something hurtful to you. Maybe it was a look, maybe it was a comment, maybe it was a joke, but you know what they said felt like a shard of ice being plunged into your heart (sorry for being dramatic.)
And even though you ignored it or laughed it off at the moment, these comments come back to you in the night or when you are alone with your thoughts. The time when someone called you fat, or when someone told you your work wasn’t good enough, or when someone made you feel less than, or when someone took something of yours you weren’t ready to give away, etc.
These moments, unless they are dealt with as they desire to be, lodge itself in a part of your brain, and then the Membrane Maestro likes to play on a loop until it hits you until you cry, etc.
2. Your self talk
Think back to the last time you called yourself an idiot. Or the last time you said I can’t do that. Didn’t take too long to think of a memory, did it? We do this so often and so unconsciously that we aren’t able to stop it before it happens.
Your brain listens to every word, thought, and whisper you make and it believes it to be true. You keep telling someone something over and over again and they eventually have to believe it. It’s a weird Shepherd and the Wolf situation, you know?
3. Your body image
Think back to the last time you looked in the mirror and were happy with what you saw. You didn’t think “Oh if only my dark circles weren’t so dark, maybe if I lost a couple of pounds, maybe if I had better hair.” Can you even remember such a time?
If you can, kudos to you, your body image game is spot on. But for those of us who can’t, it deeply affects our psyche and leads to body dysmorphia. We all think we are way different from the way we look and constantly aspire to be something or look like someone that we just aren’t.
Do you really think that’s helping your self image?
4. Your social circle
You may have heard of the quote, “You are the product of the five people you hang out with the most.” When you think about the five people who hang out the most, what kind of people do you see?
Are they people who lift you up or bring you down?
5. Your lifestyle
What time did you wake up today? And what were the things you were able to get done? Or if you are reading this in the morning think about yesterday. Are you happy with what you have accomplished?
What kind of food did you eat? What kind of activities did you do? Do they make you feel energetic or tired?
How to Improve Your Self Image
In order to improve your self image, you have to tackle the five above mentioned aspects of self image individually and all together.
Think of all the times that you felt hurt, felt like a loser, felt worthless, felt beaten down, and make a list of it all. The first step is to address the battles you are facing.
Take some time on this and make sure you make a note of all of it.
Then write down what you wish would have happened instead. The impact of this activity is two-fold:
- One it reprograms the brain into thinking this is probably what could have happened, and hence maybe this memory isn’t so bad.
- It serves as a reference for the next time a similar situation arises.
Remember when you are doing this exercise and writing down what you wish would have happened, you have to write it in the present tense.
If you are unclear about how to complete this exercise, drop a comment or DM me on Instagram @thepurpleglitchblog.
2. Become the Cheerleader or Mentor you have always dreamt of having
An idea a lot of us seem to nurse is that someone is coming to save us. Someone a fairy godmother, a handsome prince, a sugar daddy, sugar mama, sugar baby – whatever floats your boat – will swoop into your life and make everything okay.
And I am sorry to burst your bubble here but-
Throw (clap) this (clap) idea (clap) in (clap) the (clap) damn (clap) trash (clap) right (clap) now!
You need to save yourself, you need to be your biggest supporter, best teacher, and loyal best friend. Only you can pick yourself up from the ashes of your trauma and piece yourself back together again.
Speak to yourself kindly, speak positive thoughts, read inspiring books, watch aspirational movies, do everything good you can to teach your mind to be better to yourself.
You know this, you have done this, and don’t you ever let yourself forget it.
3. Appreciate your body
It may not look the way you want it to right now. And it also may not fit into the cookie-cutter model #bodygoals that are idealized and idolized before us every day.
But have you thought about how much it has gone through? Every beating you have taken, every fall, every injury, every sickness, every stub to the toe.
Your body has protected you even when you didn’t ask for it. It has allowed you to jump, dance, be free, express joy, and assert your power in ways you haven’t in realized.
The way you look is probably #bodygoals to someone else. Remember that. You have so many silent admirers who wish they had your hair or skin or waist, you probably just haven’t had a chance to speak to them yet.
There are three things you can do to start loving your body more’:
a. Say Thank You
Stand in front of the mirror and look at yourself really look at yourself and say thanks to your body for allowing you to walk as much as you did, see all the beautiful places you have visited, dance to all the wonderful beats invented, taken a kick or punch that just ended up in a bruise and let you forget all the pain, for helping you breathe every single moment of every freaking day!
Thank your body for everything it has done for you.
b. What I Like About Me
Stand in front of the mirror and point out all the things you like about yourself. Everything whether it’s the shape of your ears or the evenness of your teeth. Focus on what you like and love about your body rather than picking at what you don’t.
c. Circle of Life
I am a firm believer of both:
‘What goes around comes around’ and ‘Karma is a biatch.’
So the next time you see someone who looks good, is dressed well, has something that you find attractive or appealing – let them know. From the colour of their hair to their confidence – tell people what you like about them, it will make both you and the compliment receiver feel good.
And eventually, people will start noticing good things about you and you will be on the receiving end of compliments and appreciation.
4. Surround yourself with the right people
I am sure you must have heard about this a zillion times but this piece of advice is extremely important. The people you spend your time with have the ability to make you feel energized or drained to the core.
How will you be able to focus on your dreams when you feel drained after spending time with the people in your life?
Choose to surround yourself with people who are positive, who are high-achievers, who are grounding, who are supportive. These are the people who will help you thrive.
5. Your Lifestyle and Routine
You woke up and 1:00 p.m. binge-watched shows all day and passed out at 4:00 a.m. and say you don’t have the time to do what you want to do. Come on, get real.
When you give excuses like:
I don’t have the time
I feel too lazy
I am too tired
You need to take a step back and assess your lifestyle and routine. See what you are doing from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to sleep.
I don’t believe that you need to wake up before the rooster crows or at the crack of dawn to be productive, but you must instead hold yourself accountable for the hours you are awake.
There are five things you must do to help improve your self image:
- Wake up at the same time every day
- Make your bed and keep your surrounding clean
- Move your body to a workout routine or dance or jog etc
- Eat food that nourished you and makes you feel strong and energized
- Set your productive hours
I think most of the above-mentioned points are pretty self-explanatory. The first two will seriously help jumpstart your brain into getting ready to take charge of your day.
The last point ‘Set Productive Hours’, means when you are analyzing what you have done during your waking hours, try to ascertain the time periods when you feel the most productive. Use these hours to complete any projects or work you may have.
If this point has really piqued your interest and you would like to know exactly how to create your ideal morning routine in a step-by-step manner check out this post on – ‘Essential Guild to Create A Productive Morning Routine.‘
6. Growth Mindset and Learning
Having a growth mindset means that you live in a state where you do not allow new concepts or experiences to make you feel stuck and instead you incorporate it into your life.
This goes hand in hand with learning. Make time in your day for learning- whether it is about a person through books, podcasts, and movies or about ideas and philosophies through books and courses or about new skills through courses and classes.
Every day is a new opportunity to learn something new.
This creative was made by my very talented friend. You can follow her on her Instagram @bonartpetite for more artsy-fartsy stuff!
Self image defines how others see us and how we see ourselves. Self image is intertwined with self love. It all starts with you. Start making little efforts today to help improve your self image.
With that we have come to the the end of our post. I hope you enjoyed this one. Let me know in the comments what you want to see next.
Don’t forget to subscribe using the black subscription box that pops up when you open a page on The Purple Glitch Blog to get updates on the latest posts and inspiration.
Follow us on Instagram for more original content!